We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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