She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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