Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
FUCK WHALES
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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