We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
