dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Randomize
