I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
