Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
