therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
