super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
