My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
