so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize