Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize