"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
