She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
40s are totally the cure
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
