tell your sister to shave her snatch
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
