FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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