She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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