There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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