There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
