sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize
