Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
