no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
