I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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