i think my mom watched the whole time
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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