what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize