Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
