if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I just gift wrapped bread.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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