4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize