Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
We named our party play list daddy issues
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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