So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US
It's the American dream
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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