haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
