Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
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