I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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