Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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