Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I'm determined to sit on that face.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize