He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
someone owes me an orgasm
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize