i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
