You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
