Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Randomize