Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
