OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize