girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
