Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
