I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
