No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Randomize
