i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
