So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
