No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
