Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
