belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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