Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
